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How Not To Be: Cooped Up At Home During A Coup

How to survive a coup if you are a foreigner.

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So you have decided to holiday in Sri Lanka. You may have not heard... it's not the best of times. But don’t let that dampen your adventurous spirit. 

You probably thought of avoiding the stampede and decided to arrive two months earlier than 2019. Your foresight would have been on point IF the Government had not decided to stage a coup just as you landed on our very exotic soil. But you are now here nevertheless on our resplendent isle, And you do not want to find yourself cooped at home because of a coup. Disclaimer: Wiki, however, suggests you remain indoors during a coup.

You still can get about and squeeze in a couple of touristy things you had on your bucket list. Before you step out, we suggest you download some of these apps because one or two of these apps are quite useful when you are a tourist in a foreign country as they are useful to us locals.

Transport

If you need to go places you need a taxi service. When in Colombo do what the Colombo-ians do. Hop a tuk. Tourism is one of the main income generators for our country. Therefore you – the foreigner are a source of income to a road side tuk-tuk driver, who might attempt to milk you dry off your rupees. Do not hop into tuks off the road. You will be charged triple the amount a local is charged.

We suggest you download a taxi service app which we have loads of. UBER, Pickme, Tripmo are only a few of the services that I have used and they are easy on the purse. Interestingly UBER and Pickme deliver food. The latter only if you live in certain areas where they operate their delivery services.

If you are opting to remain indoors during your stay in Sri Lanka to avoid treading on mobs, blood, and gore, you need a delivery service. No, there have been no incidents of gore yet. However, there has been a shoot out and mobs doing mobby things in the outskirts of Colombo. The idea would be to steer clear of mobby places. Twitter is a realiable way to get news if you have a good source. Good luck with that.

If you are the adventurous type and would like to step outside and wish to see beyond the coup, you can also opt to take the bus. Why is the bus adventurous? You might wonder. Public transport is famous for crowds of people in close quarters, some behaving badly, some not. Public transport is often times over crowded, and boasts of bad driving, which have caused quite a number of accidents involving pedestrians. Buses are also very famous for their insipid choice in very loud music and of course not to forget… sexual harassment. If you would still like to take the bus, here we have some of the bus routes for Colombo.

 

Our Sarah did a piece on Bus Travel in Colombo a few years ago, which is still relevant and has a couple of links which will prove useful. We suggest you take with you on your bus ride a vocabulary of a sailor or a rolling pin. If you are groped, do not be afraid to make a loud racket about it, sometimes the other commuters will opt to wake up from their complacency and beat the crap out of the perpetrator. 

If you want to take the train, this is the website to check.

Food 

Your favorite franchise will have their own delivery services. If they don’t, we’ve also written about Food Delivery In Colombo about who delivers what. This is to ensure you don’t starve while you plan to stay indoors during your stay in our resplendent paradise isle. Other than the above mentioned, we also have Quickee, PickMe Food and Uber Eats.

If you prefer to stay indoors and cook, we have apps for that too – not one that cooks for you, but one that will pick up your grocery and deliver it to your doorstep: You have to place your order a day earlier with Direct2odoor, or use the BringMe app, and we've also done a review on GroceryPal.lk.

Entertainment

At some point during your holiday, you will come to the realization about the choices you have made regarding holidaying during a coup and it will be too late but we Sri Lankans whose hearts have been broken too invite you to drown your sorrows with us. 

We suggest you download the YAMU app, the app for the website you are reading this on. YAMU has a whole lot of sub-sections which should amply supply you with the entertainment portal you require. We have listings of watering holes, restaurants, places to visit, things to do, questions to ask etc.

We leave you with a few lines from A Tale Of Two Cities: It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way—in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.

Side note: Our country is pretty resplendent and worthy of a visit outside of a coup and bad governance.

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